G Anderson

G* Anderson, no, no, Grant A, have a nice day . . .good luck with your search!

Central Europe Mormon Ball

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

I still have no idea what I'm going to be doing this fall. I really want to work in Germany or Switzerland teaching English, but it might be too expensive to save up for a mission. Hmm. Plus, I've got a boyfriend in Salt Lake now. I guess that shouldn't be too big of a reason, but anyway . . . he is so funny! A week ago we were talking and I complimented him on something and it was so funny. He didn't say anything, and so finally I said, "What do you think about that?" I've made fun of him ever since, because he said, "It gives me this sort of . . . cocky . . feeling." The way he said it was just hilarious, stressing the "cocky." He kind of is cocky in some ways, but right now it's just endearing. Well, I don't know about cocky, but he's kind of like this boy I knew in high school? They're unaware of things going on around them, they're just lax but confident. I used to think the kid in high school was ditsy, but that's not the right word. It's more like just unaware of what's going on.

This week I bought some of my favorite movies in German (I still have to find Mulan) and on Monday Kaycie, Travis, Matt, and I went up to Friedrichsort for the meeting that started off Central Europe Mormon Week. Elder Perry and his wife were there and spoke. Afterwards, I wanted to shake his hand, but he went down the aisle and I didn't get to. Since we weren't staying the whole week, we left early. We were standing next to the bathroom waiting for Kaycie, and Elder Perry and his wife came by. Matt was holding this gigantic thing of juice, and Elder Perry said, "What are you gonna do with all that?" Matt said, "Drink it." Then Elder Perry reached out and shook my hand and Matt's hand and Travis's hand, and Sister Perry asked where we were from, what we were doing in Germany, and how we liked it. Wow!

Anyway, I went to the Central Europe ball for Mormons last night. Wow! There were more than 900 people there, and probably 97 percent of them were beautiful! Europeans are just beautiful and stylish. Wow! I love that. The cool thing is, I'd always wondered if I wore a shirt under a strappy dress if that would be really dorky. Well, many of the girls did that last night, but they made it look GOOD! They were nice shirts that just totally set off the dresses just right. They had scarves and gloves and ties around their waists and it was amazing. It was held in what is called the "Color Line," a terminal for cruise ships. So, it was a big glass building on the ocean, and there was a cool band, and I am so jealous of Europeans! They do this dance (they all know it) and it's like our slow dance except for any song (it's faster). They kind of do two shuffles forward and move their clasped hands to the beat and it's just so cool. I suck at dancing. Matt wanted to do all these fancy things and I just kept stepping on his toes. This friend of mine here named Kaycie almost completely won over this German kid (in only a few weeks - we found out that smiling at someone across the table a few nights in a row is like four months of flirting here), but then his ex was at the convention and decided that she wanted to get back together with him. The funny thing is, the night before, Kaycie had talked to him on the beach for two hours and she went to hold his hand and he said, "I would love nothing more than to hold your hand right now, but I feel like I can't until I decide what to do about Kaya." Then, at the dance and dinner, Kaycie was with him for like three hours until suddenly Kaya came up and said something about he couldn't dance with her the whole night. Poor Kaycie. I wonder what he's going to decide. Oh, by the way, his name is CORNY. Ha ha. Short for Cornelius. He's so nice. I think he knows it's not logical to go for Kaycie when she lives in Utah, but he fell for her pretty fast. Anyway, I've got to write a 20 page paper so that I can graduate in seven days and go pack for Switzerland, my home sweet home!

Kiel is better than ever, and so is my German!: Deutsch macht Sinn

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

So I've learned more German in the last few days than I did the whole time I was in Germany last year. The credit goes to a few people: my roommates and their patience while I try to tell my so-called exciting stories, Matt and Erin and a few others for filling in my sentences and answering my questions, and to me for actually being more daring to sound stupid and to study really hard this year! Yay! The coolest thing about German is that it totally makes sense. The words are just combinations of simple words to make others. For example, "vorstellen," literally, is "before to place," but it means to introduce. I love that! After almost every word that my roommates teach me, I say, "Ja, dass macht Sinn" ("Yeah, that makes sense"). If you want something to become a noun, you take the adjective and add "keit" to it. How cool.

Anyway, I went to Familie Heim Abend last night (Family Home Evening) with the single adults. Which, by the way, the word for single adults is so lonely-sounding that I don't like it. Literally it is "alone-standing people." We played ping pong and fußball and we ate pizza. I talked to an older missionary who was really interested. The funniest thing is, they hold it in the old church, and I was with Erin following Matt around the city as he kept saying, "I'm not lost. I know it's around here somewhere." Eventually I said, "Give me the map." (It sounds better in German and with the tone I used.) I said that we needed to go more north because I thought it was on Knooper Weg and the Exezier Plaza. We walked in the that direction, but he acted like he still knew where it was, and finally he said, "Okay, I give up." (45 minutes later.) I turned and said, "Let's go down that way. What street are we on right now?" We turned to look at the building (the streetnames are on the corners of buildings), and he said, "Look what building we're in front of." It was the church! Haha.

I don't know what to do about school. I talked to Professor Von Schmidt, and it seems pretty hopeless. He said I could graduate without a German minor, or I could graduate in December (however, it's too late to apply for then). I tried to work with him, and he said that he'd love to, but it's not on the computer, so it won't work. I don't know what to do. I have to call a bunch of people at the U when it gets late enough here. Well, we'll see. Wish me luck!

Plans

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

I am going to Germany in the middle of July. I looked all over the internet for a good flight price, and there weren't any! They were all more expensive than last year, and I'm poorer than last year. So, my dad finally called a travel agent, and he found me a flight for 4-500 dollars less than the others. The only downside is that I have to switch planes three times. But, I don't mind because I'm saving money and I get to stay in Madrid for a night. I'm flying out of Dallas so that I can go visit my sister down there.

School has me very concerned, because every time I think I have it figured out, there's something else that gets in the way. For example, I kept asking the head of the German department if 3060 would count for itself and for an upper level class, and he said he wasn't sure what I was asking, but it should be fine. However, I finally called the secretary, and she said that it didn't. The problem with that is that the only way to get that class now is to either take it independent study (which puts me over the nonresidency restriction), or somehow manage FOUR upper level German classes in Germany. I don't think that's possible!

Summer semester at BYU is awesome! I love how clean it is down here, and everyone is happy and nice. The professors want everyone to learn and succeed. The semester is almost over, and I'll have to work hard on getting a job and passing the American history test.

When did my heart get involved?

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

Yesterday T* was at work, and so when he came up to the third floor (I couldn't even see his face, he was talking to someone else in a row of books), I got really excited just to see him. Then Kristen looked at me and told me that I had the funniest look on my face. She kept trying to figure it out, going on and on about how I looked pleased or something. I tried to get rid of it, but I couldn't! Every time I looked at her I thought about it again, and then I would smile as big as . . . I don't know! I kept making up excuses like I thought something someone had said was funny or that I kept thinking of that time when or that I was just happy to be there. Even now as I type this I think I'm getting that look on my face again.

Then at the meeting, T* was conducting, and I was sitting right in the front middle. He didn't look at me once. I love seeing him dressed up and in charge. Then I thought he was going home and I was disappointed, but I saw him and he was staying until 5:15. That's about all that I got to talk to him about before we were walking different ways. So that meant he would come to my counter to sign out. But he never did! I checked the sign-out sheet, and he had already signed out. He never even called me! I was so mad last night. Mad at him for not calling, mad at myself for caring, and mad for a billion other weird reasons. When did my heart get involved in this? I seriously thought I was being careful enough. I guess not. Now I'm afraid. I'm afraid that it's going to hurt a lot. Bah.

Well, I asked my mom if she would do me a favor last week. She asked what it was. I said, "Would you please get me some of those long shorts that are in style right now? They have them at Mervyns." She said, "That's not a favor, and I don't buy your clothes. You're in college." Dang. Well, yesterday, we went to the DI because I wanted to buy a tennis racket for Heidi's birthday, and we started looking at clothes, and she bought me a whole bunch! Today I'm wearing a purely Melissa outfit. I have this black and white weird-patterned dress on over my jeans and shoes with flowers on them. That was so nice of my mom. She keeps saying that when we get some time we're going to go get some of those long undershirts they have at that new store (I forgot what it's called). Good.

Return of T* and the German Ward

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

T* got back yesterday. I'm so glad he's back (except that now I have to run to the bus stop instead of drive there). Other times he's been dating girls, they break up with him when they get back from a trip, so he was scared I would do the same! I said, "No, you were the one on the trip. You'll have to wait until I get back from Germany." Haha. We played Settlers with the Cities and Knights extension (this intense game that my sister always wants someone to play with her) and I got all mad because my city got destroyed and I said, "I quit. The game's over. You guys totally won . . ." and on and on and on. Sica called me a brat and then I came back to play and kept my mouth shut so that I wouldn't spew off sarcastic comments. Guess what. I won. I'm such an idiot sometimes. I don't know why I acted like that. Oh well. At least I laughed it off with T* later. Oh! T* wanted to go to the German ward with me. It was so cool! This couple that my dad knows is in charge of the translators, so Tom got a headset so he could hear the meeting in English. However, some of the high council men were there, so they spoke in English, and I took the headset so that I could hear it in German. One of the high council men tried to read a verse in German, and it was hilarious! He didn't know that Ws are Vs in German and that Js are Ys and he said, "Ik" instead of "ich." I know that he was trying, but it was just funny. Then there was this old lady with a headset on, and her hearing aid conflicted with the headset and it started squealing in a very high-pitched dreadfulness. I was giggling in the back and T* was elbowing me. I understood most of the meeting. It was less difficult than I thought, but that might have been just because of the translator. I definitely want to keep going.

I just need a tiny job

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

Well, that was disappointing. I just went and asked for a job that I heard about yesterday that seemed perfect. My coworker at the Family History Library told me last night that I could work in the Genealogy section of the library at BYU, and it sounded so awesome. She said I would get it for sure because I was practically already trained. However, they said that they can't hire just for spring/summer terms. I said, "Well, I'll be looking for a job in the fall anyway, so I could just continue working here." You have to be a student, though. Darn it! It would have been so much better than the other places I've thought of because it's right on campus. Once again, I regret not going to BYU . . . I just have to keep reminding myself that I learned a lot in my time at the U, just not at school (mostly life lessons about relationships and Mormon culture and other non-scholarly things). How sad is that to admit? I'm really disappointed! Maybe I should go back and tell them I'm going to be a student and take some classes down here in the fall. I just don't know what's going on these days. I get to BYU about two and a half hours early for my class. If I took an earlier bus I could definitely take a part-time job on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays so that I won't be 500 bucks in the hole when I get back from Germany. Hmm. Well I guess I'll try Stevenson's Genealogy next.

I checked my grades, and they look good themselves, but the GPA doesn't look as nice as I'd hoped. How can two B pluses and an A minus make a 3.43? I was hoping for above a 3.5. Anyway, it's funny that the two classes I worked the hardest in are the two that I got the lower grades in, while the one I sluffed about six times and never read a single assignment is the one that I got an A minus in. Maybe when my last grade is posted it will boost my GPA. I'm hoping that my German professor will decide that I improved so much that I deserve an A. THEN, oh my gosh! I checked my BYU independent study class grades! She's graded all but one of them, and on the second to last and the final project that took me forever, she gave me B minuses! That makes me so mad. If she had given me feedback when she was supposed to, I could have known for what she was looking. Sorry I'm complaining so much. Now I've really got to do my homework before class starts.

Finals at U, long bus to surprise - awesome BYU

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

This last month has been one of C-raziness! For about three weeks, T* and I didn't hang out much because we both had so much to do. He did me a favor and called less so that I could get more done. Isn't that considerate of him? I needed to finish my independent study class before the semester ended so that I could have the credit transferred to the U. That way the credit would be on my transcript before the current classes, allowing me to have the limit of transfer credits in the last 30 hours. I had to read about 24 books in 6 days, write essays on them, and do a huge final project before taking the final. I worked my butt off, reading all the time, and I got them all turned in. However, the teacher sent one back that said, "I only grade a maximum of three assignments per week per student." Right on the independent study website it said that a course may be finished in two weeks up to a year. (I was going for the two weeks.)

Anyway, so then I had finals to worry about - mostly essays. They were huge, long, complicated essays that I really wanted to be nice. The worst part, or should I say the best part is, at the end of the semester at the U I was starting a semester at the Y. I'd never been to BYU and I was nervous about taking the bus, but Amy showed me around. My first day, the bus was a long ride (two hours down, three hours back), but when I got to campus, I was amazed. It is SO CLEAN. SO clean. So CLEAN! I never realized how filthy the U is until I saw the Y. Plus, they have so many awesome benefits and opportunities that the U doesn't. Teachers pass around announcements, and students have a lot of organizations and activities and they talk OPENLY about the Mormon culture - disadvantages and critiques included! I love it. I feel cheated. Here I am graduating from the U, and no one ever told me that the program I was looking for was an hour away. I just wanted to avoid the stereotypes. Now I see that that is silly. They actually have an editing major. Hello! So now I'm just trying to stuff as much education into this little experience as I can. I was having trouble with literary theory, and I asked about a term in my contemporary literature class at the Y, and the professor explained it so much better than my U professor! So, I told him he was better at explaining and that I had a final coming up, and he told me (before I could ask) to come to his office to talk about it. I went, and he gave me the low-down on the terms I needed to know, as well as letting me borrow some literary terms books and giving me a bookstore bag because my backpack was too full. Wow. Now I'm super-excited about literary theory. I didn't understand that it was meant to apply to literature, it just can be applied to literature. That's mostly why I was so confused. I'd learn about psychoanalysis and Marxism and I'd say, "What does this have to do with literature?" I think I wondered that because it's called "literary theory." Well, it shouldn't be. It should be called instead, "Philosphical thoughts that can be applied to literature if you look really hard." Anyway, I've found it to be much more interesting than I previously thought. We're reading this books called: "Poststructuralism: A Very Short Introduction." It's awesome because it's in simpler language and I love reading it over and over so that I can understand more. It's like the scriptures. You study them continually and you gain more as you go along. Oh, I went to the BYU writing center and got feedback on my paper about how and why men fear women's lack of autonomy. It was another thing in BYU's favor.

Anyway, the editing internship is cool. It's the main reason I came down here. The girls in the class are awesome, and we learn interesting things like "verso" and "recto" and modifiers and concision. Nifty. I'm in charge of an article called, "Creativity in the Cosmic Context: Our Challenges and Opportunities." It argues that Christ made his will synonymous with God's, and therefore he had all creativity. As children of God, we have inherent creativity that will only come to light when we make His will ours. Some people may argue that giving up our will limits us, but instead, it allows us to have universally-wide creativity. Cool.

I've learned to like the bus. I get to catch up on sleep and do homework while I sit there. Awesome. The only thing that bugs me is when I get a bad seat or have someone next to me talking on a cell phone, or worse yet, have them keep asking me weird questions. However, today there was a mentally handicapped guy on the bus, and he kept interrupting me to ask questions. At first I was annoyed because I wanted to get my homework done, but he had such an innocent, sweet spirit. He kept saying, "We're friends, huh Michelle." Then he'd stick out his hand and have me shake it, over and over again. He talked about my mission and how everyone is related because we're brothers and sisters and about Joseph Smith (he saw what I was editing) and jobs and relationships. He wrote down his address so that I can write him a letter from my mission. So that was interesting.

Well, I finished up finals at the U and survived (barely). T* left for D.C. on Saturday. I went with him to the airport so that I could take his car back. I am so amazed that he allows me to use his car. That is such a sign of respect to me. M* never let me because he was afraid of his parents and insurance problems. The funny thing is, I kind of felt like he was going to miss me more than I was going to miss him, but I wondered how that could be, because he'd be the one having all the fun. Well, it's funny. We could go several days without talking here in Salt Lake, but now that he's ungettable I'm going a little bit crazy. It's like a heartache. And it's only for seven days. I want to call him, but I don't know what time he's busy or what time he gets up or what time he goes to sleep, and I don't want to seem desperate. Man, he's going to have a FUN time while I'm in Germany for a month. This year, I'm not calling and begging for anyone to come over. I'm diving right in and learning all I can while enjoying some rays at the beach. T* left a message on Sunday that said, "I just wanted to wish your mom a happy Mothers Day and you a future one, although I feel sorry for your kids! Haha, just kidding." Then he called later and made me so jealous. He said that he was on the University of Maryland's campus and that it was BEAUTIFUL. It just reminded me of all my dreams to go back east to school and I started worrying about money again. I will go back there! Maybe I can get an assistantship at the University of Virginia. The only thing that I'm scared about is that I now know that I don't know anything. Like the saying, "The more you learn, the more you know you don't know." I've already decided that I'm going to self-educate myself when I'm not going to school in the fall. I'll read a lot and study literary theory and work on my editing skills and see what I can do about magazine editing and publishing.

So last night we got out of work at 9:15, and no one else was parked at the conference center. Lynne offered me a ride to the conference center, and I took it. She drove away and I realized that T*'s keys were in her car. I went through a lot of phone calls to get those keys and ended up meeting Lynne and Dad at the 3300 South Trax Station. I called Lina, then Fabiola, who enlisted Ashley, then I called Julie Gail with the number Fabiola gave me, and then Lynne and Dad. Wow. Crazy night. I got home at about 10:45 and I felt like a fool who had wasted an hour and a half. The funny thing is, Dad waved to some dude sitting at the bus stop at the Trax station, and the guy came over and asked if Dad was going his way. He kept HOVERING. Lynne had pulled in right behind Dad, so I grabbed the keys and went and jumped back into the car. Dad reminded me of Grandma's saying, "Poor men have poor ways." I said, "Dad, it's your own fault that he came and talked to you. You waved at him." He said, "I thought it was you." "Haha." "You don't look like that?" Hee hee.

I used my check card for the first time yesterday. Now that is a scary thing. It is so easy just to slide that little piece of plastic and have 20 bucks zapped out of my possession. I didn't have to put in a password or sign or anything. How sad that we've become like that. That' s why I won't get a credit card.

April? AAAAAAAAAH!

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

So I am doing Spring Semester at Brigham Young University. It's like a two-hour bus ride. Whew. I'm not very excited for that, except that at least I can get homework done. I figured that since I'll be down there three days a week anyway, I should just take the classes I was planning on doing independent study before August - German and contemporary American literature from 1960 on. I have so much to do before this semester ends! Plus, my next semester starts before this one ends, so I've got to hurry and tie everything up. No one told me it was April already. It's not fair.

I went to "Slipper and the Rose" with Mom, Heidi, Grace VanDenBerghe, and Sica yesterday. It was kind of lame, but there were some funny parts. When the prince first sees Cinderella when she has the shoe (or slipper), it's a mad house at the town square. Everything goes slow-mo as they play "Moonlight Sonata" and he swirls around people trying to get to her, and the shoe gets passed from person to person as they beat each other up. It was so funny!

I saw Boo McDonald (I don't even know her first name, that's sad) and I asked her how she likes being an aunt to Morgan and Aaron's baby. She said that the baby just turned one and Morgan is four months pregnant. Whoa! I told Mom and she gave me like three examples of people who have closer kids.

Whenever I think about Janice, my piano teacher, I feel badly. I'm sure she hated having me come because I NEVER practiced. That's why it took me like two years to learn my last piece. I think that she just enjoyed talking to me. Oh well. I've been practicing a lot lately. Isn't it funny how once you don't have to you have more motivation, or if you've got something like homework to do, you find more time to play? Last night I just opened the Classics book and played random songs. I liked them a lot.

Yesterday, Mom was driving me to school (very generous of her), and we were talking, having a jolly old time, when I saw something next to me. I looked over, and a black and white spider was coming down from the ceiling! It landed next to my knee! There was nothing I could do and nothing Mom could do because she was driving. I was screaming as it jumped around (it was one of those weird-movey jumping ones, and a big one, I promise). I finally wiggled my way into the backseat and tried to hit it with the scraper, but it connected with its web first, sending it flying somewhere! I stayed in the back the rest of the ride. Sica found it later and brushed it outside . . . in Bountiful, thank goodness! My carrots are HUGE! I thinned them out yesterday. On Thursday, it got up to 70 degrees and there was a nice breeze, but yesterday, it rained like it would never stop. All the rain we've been getting has been awesome. You should see Temple Square. It's SO BEAUTIFUL! I love the purpley-blue flowers with the very spring green.

Operation Dump the Chump: April Fools

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

Tom told me like a month ago that his favorite holiday was April Fool's Day. I didn't think anything of it until Friday, the actual day, when I was thinking about the date we'd had the night before. Then I had a grand idea. I called him up, but he didn't answer his phone. I kept wussing out, but finally I left this message: "Hey Tom, this is Michelle. I want you to know that I had a really great time last night, but . . . I just don't think that we can go out again. Uh, I'm sorry. Bye . . . . . . . . . . . . . . HA! April Fool's! Call me when you get this!" Then I got a text message that said this: "Sorry I sent a text message but I've been at Davis Hospital with my brother who was injured in football practice today. I will call later. Tom." At first, I thought, "Oh sad!" Then I thought, "WhatEVer! Football practice in the spring?" Well, I waited, and sure enough, I got another text that said, "April fools! Don't be mad I will pay for the text messages. It was worth every penny." I still think that mine was a lot better. He told me later that he sunk down in his seat while he was listening to my message and he thought, "Oh man! I thought it went pretty well."

The Joy of Publication: Torn Contacts are a PAIN

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

The Century Magazine is finally out (it was supposed to be out for Friday), and it was cool to see my name in print, no matter how short and simple the "article" (which was more like a snippet) was. Then at the New Era, they gave me a contract for a short "Instant Message" I wrote that will be in the January 2006 issue for $25. I had put a story on Janet's desk more than a month ago and had not heard anything, so I assumed she hadn't liked it and didn't say anything. However, today, she came to me with a smile on her face and said, "I love this! Kids will really relate to this. It just needs to be this long for a two-pager." She pointed at the midway point on a page. I said, "Yes! It's easier to cut than to lengthen!" I looked up and Paul was standing there watching me. I reiterated that cutting is enjoyable and preferred, and I realized he was standing there just to hear my reaction. Wahoo! Wahoo! A two-pager! That means a PICTURE! Yippppy!

So I've been going to that editing class and I really love it. I find it so interesting. Did I already tell you about the front page analysis last time? That was cool. On Friday, the Chronicle (U of U's newspaper) had a full April Fool's edition. It was hilarious! I thought it was so great that I read it over and over and just laughed out loud in public. Today we went over some articles and edited them, and I sat next to this girl and watched the paper she was correcting. The funny thing is, I mentioned a couple of times things she had missed, and she made a remark about the teacher being picky when I would have been even more so. Oh well. The teacher called me "a very special visitor dedicated to improving her editing skills." She hadn't even mentioned me to the class, but today there were not enough computers, so I moved to the back and everyone was looking at me, wondering why there weren't enough (that means everyone came to class for the first time since I've been going). By the way, let me hear your opinion on this. A kid gave a presentation on the difference between "who" and "whom." His method was fine and everything, but I raised my hand and said, "I find it easier to tell which one to use by seeing if there's a preposition preceding it." Then the teacher put a sentence on the board and acted so sure that I was wrong that I was afraid to fight it. I'm sure, though! You tell me. If you were to fill in the blank in the following sentence, would you put "whomever" or "whoever" (that is, if you wanted to be grammatically, prescriptively correct): I need to talk to ___________ is in charge. She said "whoever"!

I tore a contact last week and put in a new one, however, it MUST have been the wrong one, because I could not see. I called the eye doctor and made an appointment, then dealt with a perma-headache. Since Monday I've only been wearing glasses, and yesterday I had the biggest migraine-ish thing ever! Today I finally got to go to the eye doctor, and I felt tortured and abused (repetitious, I know). I almost cried at one point, because my head hurt and they kept changing my prescription, which made my head hurt more, and I just wanted to be able to see and then they dumped goop drops in my eyes and made me sit around and on and on, and now I'm sitting in the dark, typing, waiting for my headache to subside.

Do not ask if her period is about to start

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

Mom and I have gotten along famously well for the last several months, but during the first week of March I kind of lost it. I feel badly, and I know you can't really blame your emotions on others, but certain things really set me off. First of all, I needed a stamp pad (remember Rosie?) for the Relief Society fliers that I am in charge of. (I know they assign things like that to get people involved, but I have work on Tuesday nights, so I'm a hypocrite in that I create things telling people to come and I don't even go.) Well, back to what set me off - Mom said she knew exactly where the stamp pads were, but they weren't there, so I looked all over and kept asking her where they were. Then she looked for about a minute and said that she had no idea where they could be. I wouldn't usually care about using a stamp, but Pam Newman had brought one over for me to use, so I felt like I had to use it. So I started looking around, and, . . . well, piles of junk make me angry! I have piles in my room, but they have purpose! Your previous bedroom is full of . . . NOTHING! I started pushing over boxes and digging around in tubs and opening drawers only to discover that we don't need any of that stuff! Wow, the more details I give, the more I realize that my reasons for getting angry are STUPID. Anyway, I finally made watermarks on the papers and discovered that Mom never got the toner on the printer fixed! How am I supposed to make fliers without toner? Bah! I had to print everything in blue! So on Monday, Jeff was watching some stuff he's not supposed to, so I said, "Jeff, you know you're not supposed to watch that," which can be very annoying, I know, but I said it in a nice way and he freaked out at me. I tried to defend myself but then he just made even more fun of me because I said something about "uplifting media" being supported by the prophet. He really hurt my feelings and I felt all mad about that, but I tried to let it go. Instead, I let it out. Then I did the dishes and Mom criticized me for not getting everything off that one pan. I said, "Mom, do you ever thank me? I'm the only one who does the big dishes, and they are usually from Sunday, and I do them without you asking! Maybe you should start thanking before you criticize." Whoops. During family night, they took forever to really have it, so I went and put my clothes in the washer. Except I re-discovered that NO ONE EVER puts their own clothes in the dryer or takes them out, so I had to transfer everything first. (Now, notice here that later on I get mad about her not transferring mine, how is that fair?) So I went back up to family night and they had started and we sewed buttons on material as the lesson/activity. Late that night, after I was already in bed: "Michelle, you put my stuff in the dryer without asking." She was doing her laundry in the middle of the night and decided to wake me up to tell me this. "You could have shrunk something." The next morning, I assumed that because she had been doing laundry last night, she must have moved my stuff into the dryer. Wrong. I didn't realize this until I needed my still-wet clothes. Then, to make matters worse, Mom pulled that stupid line on me that she always uses and NEVER has she been right yet: "Michelle, is your period about to start?" I HATE when she says that, because it just makes me more mad and she's never been right anyway. It always gets me to the point where I want to open my door and strangle the first thing in sight. So, I went upstairs when I was ready (in my damp tights), and dangled the keys while Jeff ate breakfast and Mom played with the stereo. Usually, Mom gets mad at me for being late, but this time it was the other way around. We finally got in the car and dropped off Jeff. When we got to the top of the lane, the bus pulls right by us. Hmmm. I'm sick of chasing buses and feeling like a fool while the bus driver watches me jump out of the van at some stop right ahead of him. Plus, these are drivers I see everyday. They KNOW where I get on. It just makes me feel stupid, so I said, "Just bring me down to the other bus." She tried to chase it instead. I repeated my request, and she turned left and left again, another thing you don't do when you want to catch a bus - backtrack. She got really angry when I mentioned that. Finally she dropped me off at a different stop and left. So, that is why I have been angry this week, and it all seems really stupid, but no, my period is not about to start, and please, never say that to anyone.

Ever since then we have gotten along just fine, but now my frustration has transferred a bit to my brother. I love him. I really do, it just seems like he treats me like I'm in junior high, and that he doesn't care about anyone else. I asked him as nicely as I could not to put towels on the floor because of spider spray and spiders and he just laughed and made fun of me. Guess what was on my towel this week? A dead spider! EEEEW! I could NOT get it off! I almost barfed, so I just left it hanging over the garbage can.

Swiss Mister Meets Wannabe Swiss Miss

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

Today I was underlining words in my German book like a madman because my class was at 9:10 and I hadn't translated the whole story yet. (I would have to hide my face in shame if you saw my underlining.) All of a sudden, a voice said, "Was liesst du?" Whoa. I almost jumped. That means, "What are you reading?" I turned to the first page and showed the dude behind me what I was reading. The rest of the bus trip I did not get any homework done, because we were excited to speak German to each other. The coolest thing is, I understood everything he said. He is from Switzerland and went on a mission to Hamburg (near the place where I study) and we talked all about German and Switzerland and our families and I tried to throw in one of those disclaimers about my German being "not so good," but he shook his head and said it was fine. (Yeah right, they all say that.) Anyway, we got off at the same stop and I wanted to talk some more, but I didn't know what I should say, so I just went into the computer lab and we said goodbye. Then I started to look up all of my German words with ten minutes to go, and I checked my email. Class was cancelled! Lucky me! Right after that, Jubi (that's the Swiss guy's name) came back in and handed me a paper with his email address, name, and phone number! Sweet! I really hope I get to talk to him some more.

Last night, T* gave me a ride home from work. That was so nice of him. I can't believe he went all that way through lame traffic to get me home, only to turn around and go back through it again. I really enjoy talking to him. We can be really open with each other (well, not about everything . . . yet, if you know what I mean, Tanwon). I wonder if he's like that with everyone. I don't know. He called me later and asked me out to dinner on Thursday. Sweet.

Happy Easter: Anti-Social Week

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

So, I dubbed this week "Anti-Social Week." Did it work? No. I tried so hard not to hang out, but I got through five days! Whoo! I was hoping to discover if not hanging out improves school work. I did get more done, but most of the time I just did something else instead. I'm going to write an article about it. The sad thing is, I had it all in my head, but I didn't write it down soon enough. I hate when that happens.

Yesterday I was dying because I felt like I was going to explode! I felt like there was no way I could continue hanging out with this kid that I have a crush on, because it's not going to go anywhere and for some reason everything he does seems amazing. Well, I made it through the day, but that creeper guy came into the library again, and I ran smack into him! I was taking the patron count and I came out of one of the aisles, and we even did the thing where you step side to side. I acted like I was busy looking at the counters and said, "Excuse me" without ever looking at him. I didn't see him again after that, so I think he left after seeing me.

So the Ute game on Friday was pretty sad. I can't say that Kentucky played really well. I don't think they deserve any credit. I think that the Utes just CHOKED. Our shooting was awful. Bogut couldn't even make his lay-ups. Next year will be 30 years since the Utes have beaten Kentucky. Lame-o.

Last night T* was giving me a ride home and he went home to change first and then I gave in and played some fussball, but I didn't win before we had to leave. He heard me talking to A* and S* about hanging out with a lot of guys and he was one of them, so I felt badly. The impression I'm trying to give is not working very well. PLUS, I left a "surprise" in his office, and he didn't even give me a reaction! It turned out that A* saw it the night before and told him about it! Darn! It was a picture of him (when he was younger, blown up three times its size) with a speaking bubble next to it that said, "I stink when I'm tied to a girl." He said that when we were doing three-legged bowling.

I emailed P* this week and told her I wouldn't be in sorority anymore. It's just too much effort for them when I'm not even dedicated. She wrote back a nice email.

In church today, I walked into Sunday School, and Dad said, "Is Mom here?" I said, "No." He said, "That lady said that she was in Relief Society." Eventually he pointed out to me that he thought she thought I was his WIFE! BAH! Then when we walked past her, he put his arm around me! Eeeew! Anyway, in Sacrament Meeting, I did really well on the organ. Those joyful Easter songs are so uplifting. The more I thought about how this meeting didn't seem much different from the others, I realized that that is because we focus on Christ's Resurrection EVERY WEEK! I'm glad we don't have crosses up in church. Instead, we focus on His life! He lives! I'm so grateful for all that he did for me so that I can return to live with Heavenly Father!

You know those feelings where you think that you're not good enough for anything and you're not sure where you're going with your life? I had a total feeling of purpose today! I knew that my calling is in the church, and I was excited to perfect different skills so that I can serve! I watched Peggy carefully during the choir piece, and afterwards, she told me to come to Choir so that I can learn from her. She said, "You'll be the leader someday." I will. I want to have the same kind of effect on my ward as Peggy has had, and I knew at that moment that I could and would if I continued to improve myself! Wahoo!

Creeper!

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

There was this creepo at the library this week. He kept checking out me and Sister M*. I sat so that my head was behind the computer, because he was really making me uncomfortable. I called Elder S* to help us figure out how to ocmbine the GEDCOM files When I sent Sister M* out to put an "Out of Order" sign on one of the computers, he gave her this really strange look. She came in and said, "That was WEIRD." "I saw that," I said, and we wondered about it. He would come over and ask strange questions and when he went to look at the Snack Room after we told him where it was, I told Sister M* to leave before he got back. Then he came over and talked to me. He said, "Are you perturbed or something?" I should have said, "Yes, you are making me very uncomfortable," but instead I denied that I was perturbed. Then he said, "That girl who was here with you earlier -- I felt this magnetism between us. It's like when we looked at each other there was a connection. We both did a double take. There are these vibes that I'm getting. There's something there. I met this woman at the post office today, and it was the same way. I have this attraction to women. In a world where everyone's scared, you have to be careful, but I'm open. It's all about intention and sharing your feelings. I told her exactly what I thought. You can't ignore those things, these magnetisms and attractions . . . " He was really freaking me out. I asked, "How is the family history going?" He said, "Well, it's like I planted a seed. I can watch it grow and sprout . . . " and on and on. THAT was even more creepy! Finally, he went to grab something at his computer, and he said, "Just a minute. I'm a really good lecturer." I ran and did books in the stacks because I didn't want to be around him any longer. When I came back, he was talking to three women. I couldn't tell if he was scaring them, so I kept walking past to try to hear what he was saying. They were smiling and nodding, but that's what I did. I debated over what I should do. I could deal with it, because I would be leaving with people in a city I know (and I called Mom to give me a ride home), but I didn't want to hear on the news that three women were abducted after leaving the Family History Library. Eventually I called Julie Gail and she told me to call Security. They asked for a description and said they'd be over to talk to me. Julie Gail sent Debbie to be with me on counter, and shortly thereafter Ashlie told me that Julie said I should come count out earlier so I wouldn't have to be around him. I was anxious to leave, and right as I passed the creeper security stopped me. I was three feet away and I had to describe what he had said. I did not like that AT ALL. Finally I rushed away, and the security guard started talking to him while I was still walking away! When I got to the stairwell, I ran up and I did not want to come back down until Kendra went with me. As we were leaving, the security guard stopped me. Since everyone was walking out, I got scared that I would have to walk out by myself, but Ashlie waited for me. He said, "I confronted him, and he was very distraught. He asked who had told us, and of course I didn't tell him, but I asked him to leave, which he did peacefully. I talked to those women and they felt scared as well. They had me watch them to their car. Thank you for letting us know. If he comes in here again, give us a call, because we can't have people talking to you or patrons like that." Yikes! I felt scared outside, but we didn't see anyone and Mom pulled up right in front. I had the worst willies, which is definitely one of Mom's words that I never use. I'm so glad I don't have to go back until Friday. I hope he's not bugging anyone else.

T* called shortly after that and he brought pastries to my house so we could work on his philosophy article. I figured that was okay during my anti-social week, because we were working, but we did end up talking for a while after and he left at 12:15. Sometimes I wonder if he ever thinks about us as being an "us," but I'm glad right now that it's very casual and we can discuss a lot of things openly - all that is, except for "us," because "we" aren't. Hee hee.

Options and Objectives

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

Here are my choices:

1. Graduate in August and audit those classes I want while I work part-time at the Family History Library.
2. Don't graduate in August, take the classes to graduate in December, work at FHL part-time.
3. Graduate in August, work full-time somewhere, audit one of the afternoon classes (Magazine Editing).
4. Graduate in August, work abroad in Zurich (I found this job with awesome benefits there, but it has no editing experience).
5. Do this editing internship at BYU during May and June, graduate in August, then work there full-time in the fall.

My objectives:
1. Graduate at the latest in December.
2. Get editing education, either through classes or hands-on experience.
3. Earn enough to save up for my mission, and possibly more for later.

Catch up

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

I know, I know, it's been quite a while. A lot has happened, and yet, not much has happened at the same time. The more I've looked at what I'm doing, the more I wonder if I'm good enough to be writing. Some of my papers have turned out quite well, but my creative writing that I thought was pretty good didn't spark any interest in the people I showed my articles to. (Whoa, I ended my sentence in a preposition.) I'm in a really strange mood right now - I'm very reflective. When I see what Janet and Shanna and Ryan can do without any effort, I feel like I'll never get to that point.

Last month I put myself on the list for the secretarial position at the FHL, and then I took my name back because I found a whole bunch of classes that I would like to do in the Fall, but should I audit them or extend graduation? I don't know.

Fabiola has begun dating this kid in her ward, and I'm so excited for her. I've done a lot of dating, but it's all confusing to me. Sometimes I wonder what's wrong with me that I should change my mind so often. Do you know what I mean? Maybe it's just a girl thing. For example, I'll think, "Man, I wish I had someone to be my best friend/boyfriend." Then the next hour I'll think, "It's so nice to just be by myself." Then I'll think, "Why hasn't anyone called me?" then, "Why does this kid keep calling me?" then, "I can't wait for him to call," etc.

Last week, I spent a lot of time writing essays and dealing with problems involved with them. For example, on Friday morning, I was going to get up early on Friday to finish my essay that was due at nine o'clock, but I just couldn't get up. Then Mom came in and said that if I wanted a ride to the bus stop I'd have to be ready in fifteen minutes. I hurried around and grabbed my jump drive that has been corrupted ever since Jeff yoinked it out of the computer without exiting. When I got to school, my file wasn't on the jump drive and the writing center wasn't open. So I called Mom, who doesn't know how to attach files and didn't want to learn, so I told her step by step how to copy and paste the file into an email. When I got it, I had to re-format the whole thing, and it was two pages shorter than it had been! I made sure the

Simplification and Positivication

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)
So, guess what I have finally succeeded in doing? Simplifiying my life! Heh heh heh! Last week I was signed up for 23 credit hours and some independent study classes, service study at West High and Bad Dog Discovers America School, my job at the Family History Library, editing work at the New Era, and coaching basketball. Well, last week, everything fell into place! It made me so happy! I discovered that the teaching thing won't work out - you have to have a major as well, and you have to work full time for a YEAR without pay! So, I wouldn't be done for a lot longer than I thought. Thus, I dropped the minor and ended up with the oh-so-glorious amount of twelve credit hours! NO WAY! (Well, and a few independent study classes) Plus, I no longer have those service learning things, so that eliminates more things on my schedule. Yay! I'm doing a lot more writing and reading, for classes, volunteer work, and for fun. The one problem is, Mom now thinks that means I should get another job. SHOULD? Probably. I can't handle it, though. I've been so stressed out the last year trying to work my bum off. However, when I look at my financial situation, I know something's going to have to change, or I won't be going to Germany to finish my German minor (I'll be done with English this semester!) I can't believe I'm graduating in two years, but then when I look at other people, I can't believe that they have so much longer to go.

Tanya went with me to the Century meeting, and now she's getting involved in the design and she'll probably do some writing. We went to the Design Editor's art show on Tanya's Birthday. It was really cool. So I gained a portfolio in two days several different times: applying for Sterling Scholar (in several areas), and for that New Era internship. Tanya's trying to pull one together for the Century. I'm so hoping I can get that New Era internship or another job there in the fall. Otherwise, I'm out of luck. Getting involved with the New Era and the Century Magazine and the Enormous Rooms literary magazine has really helped me. I get a lot more ideas now of what to write. After the first Century meeting, I went home and started three different stories. I've had a crush on one of the Century people for so long (over a year), but I'm afraid to do anything about it, because I might scare him away. Plus, he's been dating someone (but why does he always write about being single?). Enormous Rooms is cool. I went through a lot of poetry and had a lot of the same opinions as the first proofreader, but there were a few questionable ones that I put "NO" on and he put "yes!" on. Then there's the contrast of the super-Mormon girl with the Century. Everything we read aloud she said it might offend someone, and then someone mentioned an article about being a girl and being 21 and unmarried, and Tanya and I just laughed and got bug-eyed, while that girl totally got excited. "Oh! I know all about that! I have several friends going through that." GOING THROUGH THAT?!?!?!??! I couldn't believe that she said "going through that" as if it was a trial to be endured! I laughed at the senselessness of it! Tanya and I kept looked at each other and wondering about that one . . . There were several articles that were really attention-getting but seemed to have no conclusion.
Someone called yesterday about the Jetta. She asked questions about all the things that were on the posting anyway, and then said she'd like to come see it on Monday. I gave her the coordinates, and then she said, "How do I get there?" That surprised me. How do you get north or south or west or east? She kept naming places she was near and a road called the 806. I said, "Do you know I-15?" She said no, and then asked, "Are you in Orange County?" Oh boy. I said, "I'm in UTAH." That surprised her. For some reason she didn't know that I was in Utah, so she said, "Never mind" and hung up. Darn.
Last night, Tanya and I went to the fireside. We were late and slid into some chairs in the back. All of a sudden the girl in front of me turned her head a little, and Tanya and I went, "Oh!" It was Ronda! She was directly in front of me, and Hollie was directly in front of Tanya! What are the chances? Hee hee! I was so surprised and happy that I just laughed for a while. Then we laughed because the people who were speaking were bearing their testimonies about sororities and fraternities . . . . okay. Then Ellis Ivory spoke about being happy. I really need to stop criticizing so much and become the super-positive person I once was. Sadly, Mom said that when I was little she would have guessed that I would be very dainty and lady-like when I grew up. That made me feel badly. It never bugged me until she said that. Then Tanya and I talked for a long time about our goals and weaknesses and on and on. I gave her a birthday present, and she kept protesting, but I really felt like she has been such a close friend that she needed something more than dinner. (On Saturday we went to Buca di Beppo. Fabiola and I were the first to arrive, and then Tanya and Joanna fifteen minutes later, and April forty-five minutes later, and Jenny an hour and a half later, and MIchael even later! The whole thing took FOREVER! It was fun, but way too long. I just wanted my food, but it took forever to be seated and to order and to get it. BUT, it was REALLY good! The garlic mozzarella bread was so amazing, I would seriously eat just that for dinner. I tried fried Calamari and then I got some spaghetti. Joanna and April took a while to decide on desserts even though I thought it was already decided. They ended up getting what I had started ordering when they said they weren't ready yet. The waiter brought this big candle thing and everyone around sung "Happy Birthday". Then, we finally got the check and they couldn't figure out how to split it. They stared at the number for a long time, and finally I put down what I had and they paid with debits and we were out of there in an all-time record of THREE HOURS. Luckily, our waiter heard Tanya say that he was a slowpoke on the way out. I had told Tom that we'd be at his house around ten, but it was really eleven-thirty, so I stopped in and said hi and then went home. I really would like to go back to Buca on an un-crowded night and just have garlic bread. MMMM.)

I feel much happier today. Ha. That reminds me. My mom and I chased a bus today. As we were going up 3900 South, I saw it pass, so I "cried out" (ha ha, I don't know what else to call it - that sounds old school though), and she said, "What's the other option?" But then she took forever to turn around and we got to 2000 East and 3300 South and saw it coming, but the light wouldn't change! If it had, it would have been a lot easier. Of course, it did, right as the bus was turning, and then no one was at the next five bus stops! We just kept going and going, and finally when the bus pulled over she sped ahead and dropped me off. The bus almost didn't pull over for me because it was that close behind us. I made it! Phew! My mom scored some big points!

So today's institute class was so cool! Brother Wade came (from the Pre-field Mission Department) and showed us some pictures of missionaries and tattoos (if they have one that's not in an inappropriate place, they have to send in a picture!) and talked about how Elder Eyring decides (wow!). I asked him at the end if people ever put things about where they wanted to go. He said that every now and then the priesthood leaders will write something about what they want to do, but he said, "I didn't want to go to Anaheim, but it was amazing how I discovered that it was inspired over and over." (Or something like that.) I really knew that the twelve are inspired.

William Godwin and Mary Shelley - I knew it!

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

Well, I have internet access now because I go to school every day and have a choice of fifteen or so computer labs, two of which are in the two buildings where my classes are. I can't believe how much I have to do! I always seem to get to this, where I just stare and stare at a paper with my schedule and wonder "Where in the world is there more time? Why, oh, why is there not more time? There HAS to be more time! It's got to be on here somewhere!" And I stare some more and eventually I get stressed out and go to bed when I should be doing something more useful like homework. Today I was discouraged in my new German class, because I didn't know all of the words, and the teacher is Austrian - I'm not used to those accents. But then Tatum's class was great - he's brilliant. At first I did some other work while he was talking, but then I began to enjoy what he was saying. My mom and I were debating the other day why I thought the novels she read are pulp and what makes great literature, and we're discussing that! Best of all, when I went into Franta's class, I told Hannah and Travis how I felt that Frankenstein and Caleb Williams were totally similar - they both have the same language and frame stories and the destructive but virtuous character. Then, during class, Travis asked Franta about it, and he said that Mary Shelley was William Godwin's DAUGHTER! Wahoo! I picked up on a connection. Then I made a ton of other connections in the discussion - with Jamison's discussions about Coleridge and Wordsworth and the sublime and the imagination being romantic, not the harlequin-type love fluff fiction. I talked to dad on my cell phone for a LONG TIME, trying to figure out his paypal account for ebay. It was so hard, because he was making it hard. He kept saying, "Now what do I do?!? This is a pain in the petootie!" He kept saying he didn't want to reset his password, but the whole point of resetting it was because he couldn't remember it in the first place! Bah! Tonight, our basketball team won! Some of the girls had NO IDEA what basketball is, but I tried to explain and give them some playing time. At first I subbed all of them in together, but it was not pretty, so I remedied that action and it turned out well. Then I went and saw Jeff wrestle. He won, and this kid wants to line me up tomorrow, but I don't think I have time to date this semester. Anyway, I should definitely not be sitting here typing this up. Ciao!

UTA service, pancakes, feedback, silly emails

(Transferred from my old blog on 18 August 2008.)

-This morning, Mom dropped me off late to the bus stop. I knew that I was going to have to wait and be really late to Institute, AND FREEZE! I stood there on crackly ice and thought, "Heavenly Father, please let something work out." I kept looking at my watch and down the street, hoping that somehow it was late. Well, guess what? This truck with emergency lights (not flashing) drove past me and pulled over. Then it signaled to the left and did a U-Turn. As it pulled up to me, I saw that the side of it said, "UTA". The lady rolled down her window and said that the bus was on time today and I must have just missed it. She asked where I was going and told me to hop in. Yay! Thank you, HF! I got to listen to the radios talk about different bus schedules and transfers. We talked a little. Her name was Angie. She dropped me off and I was ten minutes early! Then when I walked into the Institute, I smelled something yummy! There was a plethora of pancakes in there! I ate a few and talked to Tim (who was making the pancakes and on whom I used to have a crush but he is now married) about doing some writing. He asked me for feedback, and at first I was scared, but then I told him what I thought, and he asked me to come to the meeting with some specific feedback on the last three magazines. Yippy!
-So I'm going to be doing service learning at West High and Bad Dog Discovers America school, behind the Gateway.
-This kid in my class today said that he used to be Mormon and he went on a mission to Romania. I'm going to talk to him. The problem is, he knows all our "methods". Just kidding.
-I hope I get into that Shakespeare class!
-I hope I get to at least go on a date with Dave - I'll be working with him soon.
-I emailed Stowie. Hee hee. I told him that I was embarrassed and flattered and surprised about the song, and that we could discover his whole dating history. Then I told him I hope I didn't offend him on Sunday and that I was too busy to think about relationship things. Lastly, he sent me one of those weird surveys that asks things like, "What was the first thing you noticed about me?" I answered all of the questions in the silliest way possible. I said he was a red-eyed atheist and that the first thing I noticed was the football-sized lump jutting out the side of his neck. (Seinfeld) The nickname I gave him was Loiter Goiter, and the "best memory" was "the time you let me touch the goiter". Hahahahahahaha. I was laughing so hard in the computer lab. Anyway, I've got to go. Have a fabulous day!