11 December 2009

Johnny Cash's "Hurt"

While I was chatting with a friend and opening up about my fight with depression, he sent me this video:





Isn't it awful? But in a way it's a good awful. You know exactly how much hurt is really there. His voice sounds dead. After listening to it, I asked, "Oh man, do I sound like that?" Apparently I do. Or did when I asked that.

These are the lyrics:

I hurt myself today
to see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
the only thing that's real
the needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but I remember everything
what have I become?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end
and you could have it all
my empire of dirt

I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of thorns
upon my liar's chair
full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
beneath the stains of time
the feelings disappear
you are someone else
I am still right here

what have I become?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end
and you could have it all
my empire of dirt

I will let you down
I will make you hurt

if I could start again
a million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way

3 comments:

  1. I love this song, but Johnny Cash's version is a cover of Trent Reznor's (NIN) song. You can also find a video of Kermit singing it on youtube (that one's kind of funny).

    I listen to/sing this song when I've done something monster-ish to my kids. i.e. when I feel like scum.

    ReplyDelete
  2. i'm so sorry you have to deal with depression. i've been there. off and on. year in, year out.

    let me know if you find something that works for you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love this song/video. Every time I watch it I sob. I feel like it perfectly captures what it must feel like to be standing at the end of your life and looking back at it all and realizing everything is ashes to ashes dust to dust — in a really breathtaking becoming-one-with-the-universe way. Hard to explain. But I love it. All the best in your hunt for solutions. If you're looking for music to help trigger feelings, I'd suggest Sigur Ros. Really beautiful, stirring stuff. And all the lyrics are in Icelandic, so you can attach whatever meaning you want to them. "Glosoli" is my favorite, video and song. (Sorry for the rambly comment.)

    ReplyDelete