Ow Ow Ow Ow Ow

Ow ow ow ow ow. This morning I woke up even earlier because of the pain (2:49). I hate it. I felt too tired to do anything about it, so I just lay there until it spread and hurt until I couldn't stand it anymore. Then I put on some sports relief rub, took some acetaminophen (it hadn't been six hours yet for the ibuprofen which is going to take its toll on my stomach some day), and microwaved my rice bag (much to the chagrin of my parents, I'm sure, who are on the other side of the wall from the microwave). How can I become so stiff while I'm sleeping? Isn't sleep the ultimate relaxer? Ow. I don't even want to hold my head up.

Recently, Amy and I had a funny discussion about how our family doesn't fix things. We just "make do." If the handle breaks on something, you just figure out how to use it without the handle. She said she is always surprised when Paul says, "We should do something about that . . . whatever," and then he does something. When the Glausers say, "We should do . . ." it means, "We should, but we don't want to spend money on it," even if it means that the problem will worsen and become more expensive with time.

So the whole reason for that last paragraph was for me to say that it's been 7 years. That is a long time in the life of a 22-year-old. Sure, I've gone to a physical therapist and a chiropractor (heavenly) and even a spine-stretcher. But I've never stayed for the long haul. I've never committed my money to really getting rid of the problem. Ow. What kind of doctor do you go to for problems holding your stress in your neck and shoulders? (It's always worse when I am stressed, which makes it even worse because when I can't sleep I get more stressed, which means more pain, and less sleep, and more stress, et cetera--I call it the deadly cycle, especially when it gets to the point that I cry because I'm just so tired but I can't sleep and it hurts.) I have no idea what our current insurance would cover. After the episode at the pharmacy, I don't think I care to find out, which will probably bring me to 8 years. I should have done something about it while I was on DMBA, but I was too busy working like a mad man, and transportation to and from would have taken so long my hours would have been funny. Excuses, excuses. Maybe I'll explore the options when it's really time to get up. Or maybe it will take a few more crazy nights like this for me to give in.